WHEN DID "SEX" BECOME A FOUR-LETTER WORD?
by Mark Budd, Senior Editor, egratification.com

According to Overture, a leading Internet marketing services company, close to 8 million searches on the word "sex" were done on the Internet last month. Now, although we haven't seen documented evidence, we would hazard to guess that this would certainly be in the top five. By comparison, "Paris Hilton" generated 2 million searches. "George W Bush" generated a mere 30,000 searches. And "Katrina", 130,000 searches.

Sex in the media is pervasive and the Internet is no exception. Unfortunately, this proliferation has blurred the clear delineation between sex and pornography. In fact, if you asked a handful of people, many would claim that sex is pornography. According to a study conducted by a UK organization, UK Children Go Online, teenagers see more pornography on the Internet than other media. Internet parenting controls have gone from commodity to necessity, not unlike anti-virus software. These controls do indeed serve the objective of blocking out indecent sexual material from unsuspecting children and youth, but at the same time prevent decent, mature sex education related web sites from reaching this developing and permeable audience.

The Internet is an excellent vehicle for reaching the masses. The 'Net has spawned a global marketplace where businesses of all sizes can reach a customer around the world as easily as reaching a customer around the corner. Families can stay in touch regardless of geographical boundaries. And vital information can be disseminated in a matter of seconds.

This channel of opportunity has not escaped the minds of racists, terrorists, or sexual deviants. These groups are flourishing on the Internet because, unfortunately, there is a demand. For every sex education site on the Internet, there are 1,000 sites selling indecent and degrading sexual videos and photos.

Because of a lack of regulation and controls, the Internet has become a breeding ground for indecent and offensive sexual material. This has, in fact, impacted our marketing efforts for eGratification. We aim to provide our visitors with sex education and information from leading sex professionals in a mature and tasteful manner. Unfortunately, because our content is of a sexual nature, we are grouped together with other "adult" and "pornographic" sites. We've even been told that we can't use the word "sex" in any of our advertisements. You try selling a sex education and therapy site without using the word "sex".

In August, we learned that an up and coming free monthly newspaper, The Fool(www.countyfool.com), was discontinuing a popular sex information column, "Ask The Sex-Pert" due to pressure from conservative advertisers. The regular feature, written by local California sex therapist and psychotherapist, Stephen Braveman, a licensed marriage and family therapist listed on our site, included questions and answers regarding sexual and relationship concerns and a "Funny True Life Story" in which Braveman shared a humorous experience from his long history of being sex educator, counselor and therapist. The column had been credited with boosting readership of the local paper and was well liked by many.

"I didn't want to cut it. I really like the column" said Mike Miele, publisher of The Fool. In an interview, Miele explained how the cash strapped publication was under pressure by two conservative advertisers who were displeased to see their name appear in print with the word "sex".

Braveman stated "our country is caving in to the conservative minority's agenda of restricting American's sexual expressions and activities by cutting sex education, limiting reproductive rights and deciding for others what is and what is not okay to do in the privacy of one's own bedroom." Braveman explained how professional experts in the field of sex education, counseling, therapy and research find little financial support for their scientific endeavors to bring factual sex information to Americans while the conservative agenda is well funded. "It's no surprise that sex information articles, adult bookstores and resources for the enhancement of human sexuality are disappearing while access to these resources are under attack. Of course, when Americans are denied access to scientific and professional information about sexuality, we all suffer!"

We truly believe there is too much smut on the Internet. And we strongly advocate the need to control access to this material. But at the same time, we must clearly draw a line between education and abomination, informative and destructive, therapeutic and pornographic. Sex is a beautiful thing between consenting adults. And there is a great need to educate the young on sexual topics and ethics. We will continue to provide our visitors with advice from leading sex professionals. And we will continue to grow our catalogue of vibrators, condoms, and sex education DVDs. In these days of guns and war, it is even more important to expose the virtues of sex and love.

Feedback:

Your article identifies a critical issue concerning censorship of sexual issues on the Internet and elsewhere. The irony is that many adults are more concerned with sex than with violence. As I found in a cross-cultural study I conducted with Dr. Murray Straus, there is an inverse relationship between sex and violence: the more sex is repressed and censored, the more sexual frustration, aggression and violence.

We all know there are inaccurate and accurate sites about sex. The problem is most people don't know the difference. This is one reason I wrote a new book, The Naked Truth About Sex: A Guide to Intelligent Sexual Choices for Teenagers and Twentysomethings. It is at Amazon and in stores.

Stephen Braveman is a legitimate sex educator and marriage and family therapist. It is a sad commentary that his column was dropped because of the FEAR that advertisers would stop supporting the publication. Fear is such a negative feeling, and often it is just that: fear, not reality.

I have experienced similar censorship. NPR's "All Things Considered" won't discuss my book, as they say it is "too edgy." Where do you draw the line? If something arouses, is this bad? I don't think so. Pornography is a term used to denigrate a sexual depiction the viewer is uncomfortable with. Surely we as a society can get beyond such a juvenile approach to human sexual expression. It is the censors who are irresponsible--not those of us who educate about sex. - Roger Libby, Ph.D., drlibby@drrogerlibby.com
 

Your comments are appreciated.