How can I get my husband to want to have more sex? I like to use toys but I don't think he knows that. We have been married for 4 years now and I am scared that he will think I am disgusting.

The fear you have discussing the use of sex toys is not uncommon. We often are uncomfortable sharing our wants and desires for fear of rejection or that our partner will think we are weird or disgusting. Toys can be a wonderful way of enhancing one’s sex life. My suggestion is you talk to your husband outside of the bedroom about what you are interested in trying. Remember men have a shallow ego and you don’t want to make him feel like he is not good enough and that the toys are better than him or taking his place. Find a way to include him in your use of toys. Maybe perform a masturbation show for him by using some of your toys. Men are very visual. The sight of you pleasuring yourself could be very erotic for him. - Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.

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