My boyfriend takes a long time to finish and I start to hurt after a while. How can I help him get satisfied without getting tired or starting to get pains in my legs?

One suggestion would be prolonged foreplay. Get him close to orgasm prior to penile insertion in the vagina. Manual stimulation, oral sex and a good vibrator may help. You may want to explore "my turn-your turn" pleasuring. Both of you focus on your orgasm and then you both focus on him, using whatever brings you/him pleasure. Have fun, and stay in touch with us.  - Answer provided by Tim Britton, Ph.D., AASECT, ABS, timbritton@yahoo.com.

You ask an important yet not easily answered question. It is actually quite normal for there to be differences in "time to orgasm" for men and for women. Therefore that fact that he is taking "longer" is not unusual. The issue is about satisfaction. One things that perhaps both of you need to consider is that orgasm is not the only sign of satisfaction. Another issue is concerning sufficient stimulation. He needs to tell you what is arousing and you will need to truly listen and learn. Also, he might try masturbation either before intercourse or following intercourse - whichever is more satisfying to him. - Answer provided by Michael Gonzales, Ph.D., mfgonzal@speakeasy.net, www.upasoc.com.

I think it is important you discuss your discomfort with intercourse with your boyfriend. Sexual intercourse should be mutually enjoyable. If you are experiencing pain or discomfort you may have vaginismus or dyspareunia. Many men think they need to last a long time in order to satisfy women. Your boyfriend may just need some education on what actually feels good to you. You may also want to consider using some lubrication such as Astroglide.
- Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.

To read more Q & A's or to ask a sex therapist a question, click here.