My fiancé seems to be addicted to porn. He has pictures stored on his computer, pictures in his computer bag, etc. Is this normal behavior? Is it possible that I'm not enough for him? Is this something I should be concerned about? He is a 43 year old man, so it's not like he's a curious teenager.

It is estimated by various sources that 80% of Internet website visits are to porn sites. Many individuals seem to be able to treat porn casually, as entertainment perhaps or maybe even a diversion. Others become obsessed and it tends to become addictive and interferes with all other parts of his/her life. Others use "porn" as an activity shared by both partners as a warm-up for sexual activities. Whether this is a problem for you or for him should be defined by a non-judgmental conversation when the opportunity presents itself. Be cautious and non-confrontational, especially if his response is defensive and outraged and indicative of denial. If this is difficult for you, please seek the services of a competent marriage and family or sex therapist in your area. - Answer provided by Tim Britton, Ph.D., AASECT, ABS, timbritton@yahoo.com.

The fact your fiancé is viewing pornography in no way means you are not enough for him. Men are very visual in their sexuality. If you feel threatened by him viewing erotica you may want to communicate that with him. I tell all of my clients that viewing pornography is not a problem unless it interferes with the person’s ability to be intimate with their partner. If this is the case I suggest you both go to a trained sex therapist to resolve the situation. - Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.

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