All of a sudden I went from lasting thirty minutes without a condom, to literally five minutes with a condom. Nothing has changed in our sex life. I have been really stressed lately and the only thing that I can come up with is that my body physically needs that release. Is that possibly the reason why it changed suddenly?

The difference between sex with a condom and without a condom is a matter of sensitivity. Typically it is more sensitive to have sex without a condom. I recommend putting a dab of lubrication in the tip of a condom. It will feel more like having intercourse without a condom on. In addition, stress can definitely affect your sexual functioning. I would give it time and try some other relaxation activities to help reduce stress. - Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.

We typically want things to get over quickly that cause us anxiety. You might want to explore this with your partner. Do whatever you can to relieve the pressure and anxiety before being sexually intimate with your partner. Slow down and enjoy some gentle, slow, non-demanding lovemaking. Literally, stop movement when you approach the "point of ejaculatory inevitability". You can "make" sex play last forever, if this is what you really want.
- Answer provided by Tim Britton, Ph.D., AASECT, ABS, timbritton@yahoo.com.

Yes, stress can bring on quick ejaculation. I wonder, though, what brought on the use of condoms when “nothing has changed in [your] sex life”? Did you introduce them because of ejaculation starting to come on quickly? If so, this can be a good solution when a man is overly sensitive. The fear of quick ejaculation in itself, however, can bring it on. So there may be both stress and fear now supporting you to ejaculate quickly. Try taking some time away from the stress where you and your lady will have plenty of time to relax, cuddle together and pet and play. Make intercourse and ejaculation irrelevant: if they happen, fine; if not, fine. The most important thing is to have FUN! - Answer provided by Jenny Friend, MFT, Board Certified Clinical Sexologist, JennyFriendMFT@sbcglobal.net, www.CenterForClarity.org.


To read more Q & A's or to ask a sex therapist a question, click here.