I just had sex for the first time yesterday. We had sex from 11 am to 3 pm. The first time hurt, but the second time felt great, though it hurt a little (in the same day). Today we had sex again, and it hurt just like it did in the beginning. Does that mean I wasn't healed up or something? How long are you supposed to wait after your first time before you do it again? When will I be able to fully enjoy sex?

I assume you mean that you had your first intercourse yesterday. I trust that you used protection every time! Since I don't know if you are male or female, I can't be sure what is hurting, but in the female, the tissue around and in the vagina is very fragile and can get sore if intercourse occurs frequently. Using a good, water-soluble lubricant should help the situation. Sometimes women can't produce their own lubrication fast enough to keep up, especially if intercourse is repeated in a short period of time. Remember to urinate before and right after intercourse (both partners), use lots of lube, and protect yourselves (I like 2 methods, one for him plus one for her). - Answer provided by Linda Newharet Lotz, MSW, PhD, Swansong51@aol.com

Having sex for four hours the first time you ever had sex is expecting a lot from your vagina!! Initially, there may be some soreness after sex and yes, your vagina probably needs a little 'rest time' in between encounters. Be sure you are using a good lubricant and use a lot of it. Most women don't know you are supposed to lubricate the PENIS as well as the vagina for optimum lubricant. As you continue to have sex your vagina will accommodate and there won't be much soreness, especially if you don't start penile vaginal penetration until you are well lubricated. Good Luck!! - Answer provided by Dr. Shay Roop, RN, LMHC, Ed.D, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Board Certified by the American Board of Sexology, shay@drshay.org, www.drshay.org.

There is much more to sex than intercourse. It sounds like you had prolonged intercourse which could cause pain and discomfort. One of the things you could try is a water based lubricant such as Astroglide or a silicone based lubricant such as Wet Platinum. These lubricants will prevent friction and will make sex more enjoyable. In addition, it is important to focus on foreplay in the form of oral and/or manual stimulation. This is the key to fully enjoyable sex! - Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.


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