My boyfriend and I just started dating not that long ago. We are now starting to be sexual with each other. I have noticed that he can't orgasm when we have sex. He gets really close but can't seem to do it. He has no problems with orgasming through other means. Is there anything I can do to make him orgasm? What could be the cause of this? Please help.

What is described here is not uncommon. It usually has to do with anxiety. What you could do would be to help him be more comfortable and to assure that the focus on the interaction is not on his ejaculating. The focus needs to be on your interaction, on your relating, not on his ejaculating. - Answer provided by Michael Gonzales, Ph.D., mfgonzal@speakeasy.net, www.upasoc.com.

What you and your boyfriend are experiencing is not uncommon. Many men have similar issues. The difference between having an orgasm via intercourse verses alternative methods is the amount of pressure. Many men use a firm grip while masturbating and then when they have intercourse the sensation is not the same. My recommendation is for your boyfriend to stop masturbating or using other alternative methods for orgasm for the next month. He needs to train his body to have an orgasm through intercourse. Remember it is not because of you or your fault he can't have an orgasm during intercourse. He is responsible for his orgasm just like you are responsible for yours. - Answer provided by Jason S. Quintal, Ph.D., MSW, LCSW, DrJ@RelationshipSpecialties.com, www.RelationshipSpecialties.com.

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